Support requesting with communication temptation activities

How does your child request?

For toddler, preschool, and school-age kids with language delays and disorders, the ways in which they request often take a variety of forms:

• Reaching

• Pointing

• Pulling you by the hand to the object

• Attempting to gain access to the item independently 

• Grunting 

• Moving over to the item and looking at you

• Yelling or whining 

• Producing jargon (i.e., strings of syllables with the intonation of adult speech)

It’s important to understand a child’s current means of making his or her wants known if they are not yet using words, signs, and/or picture symbols. It is only once we observe how a child is asking for objects that we can then target the next developmentally expected communicative behavior in therapy. For example, if a child is pointing to request but not yet integrating a vocalization with his or her point, we may think about strategies that can be used to support them in combining a gesture and a vocalization. For children that are attempting to gain access to items independently, we may start by targeting eye contact when requesting.

How do we target these behaviors?

An effective strategy to target requests is a communication temptation activity. This occurs when an adult temporarily holds a desired object (e.g., snack, puzzle piece, block) slightly out of reach and pauses to provide a child with an opportunity to request. An example is listed below:

At the start of snack time, Kim gives her 2-year-old daughter, Lily, a few goldfish. Kim then holds the remaining goldfish in her hand. The goldfish are visible to Lily, yet slightly out of reach. Kim then waits a few seconds to determine how Lily requests additional goldfish once she finishes those that were originally given to her. 

If Lily typically requests by reaching for the goldfish, Kim may wait a few additional seconds to see if Lily makes eye contact or vocalizes when reaching. If Lily makes eye contact with Kim and vocalizes while reaching for the goldfish, Kim then praises her (e.g., clapping, saying, “Great job!”) and models a simple phrase (e.g., “More goldfish,” “Look you want more!”). It should be noted that the communicative behavior you are waiting for (e.g., gesture, word approximation, manual sign, etc.) in the moments before giving your child access to the item or activity varies based on what skill we are targeting.

What if your child doesn’t produce the targeted behavior (e.g., pointing, vocalizing, etc.) during the brief pause in which you are still holding the object?

If your child becomes frustrated or doesn’t make a request, you can then model an appropriate communicative behavior, such as signing “More” or saying, “Eat object.” This shows your child an appropriate way to request more of a desired item. The hope is that your model can be faded to independence with repeated practice.

A few additional points on what a communication temptation activity is not:

We should be mindful that it’s not natural to structure a child’s mealtime or playtime such that food and toys are constantly being withheld. That would be quite frustrating for your kiddo! Instead, we can think about ways to intermittently incorporate communication temptation activities amongst your child’s normal routines. You don’t need a communication temptation activity to to model and embed language for your child. However, communication temptation activities provide us with the opportunity to pause, observe, and subsequently modify our behavior based on what the child is or isn’t doing to request!

Additionally, the goal of a communication temptation activity is not to frustrate your child. We never want to hold an object or activity out of reach for so long that your child becomes frustrated. The aim is to provide additional time for your kiddo to either make a request or expand upon their current means of requesting. Remember that pausing and providing children with wait time is a good thing, as it gives them with additional processing time and reduces any pressure associated with communication.

Finally, it’s important to be thoughtful of what activities or objects to use within communication temptation activities. You want to pick an object that is motivating for your kiddo, but not so motivating that they immediately become upset when you are in “control” of it. You also don’t want to pick an object that your child isn’t interested in, as they will likely lose interest in it as soon as you withhold it. It’s essential to find that balance!

Here are some of my favorite ways to incorporate communication temptation activities in therapy:

• Snack time: Communication temptation activities are most easily used with snacks that are already broken into pieces (e.g., pretzels, fruit snacks, candy, etc.).

• Puzzles and blocks: Hold onto just a few puzzle pieces when completing a puzzle or blocks when building a block tower.

• Bubbles: When blowing bubbles with your child, pause every so often to see how your kiddo requests continuation of the routine. Try saying, “Ready, set…” and pausing to see if they will fill in the phrase with a vocalization or word approximation (e.g., “Go!”).

• Tickles: If your child loves tickles, consider pausing with an expectant facial expression. You may consider saying, “I’m gonna…get you!” to see if they will fill in your phrase.

• Songs or videos: When singing a song or watching a video, pause occasionally to see how your child asks to continue the activity.

Comment below with your favorite ways to use communication temptation activities.